you dont need to remember merediths name haha. only jane
All I have in my fridge is chocolate cake, pizza, spicy mayo sauce, beer, and weed. I love college
I sat a few seats down and one row behind a cute girl at the Cubs game today. Having watched her talk to the guy next to her, I found out only her name and age. I then used that information and pieced it together with over 500 girls on Facebook with the same name. I found the same girl, and we're now fbook friends.
if being a creepy fuck was an olympic sport, they'd think you were using performance enhancing drugs...
Holy christ fuck what has my trainwreck of a life come to just blew a 17 year old so help me god
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
good news: I made it out of bed and into shower. Bad news: I made it back to bed without clothes. Worse news: I don't know this bed.
I haven't seen him since I gave him a hand job in the hospital. I like to think I contributed to his speedy recovery.
That hot shower felt like it washed away all of my problems... Except being pregnant... Ps just found out I'm pregnant. Fuck.
He has a bathrroom scale in his room with an alarm attached to it so anything over 150 sets it off and in his drinking stupper he can make a run for it.
I learned a very valuable lesson tonight...don't touch a cops tazer
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Do you think it would be a margarita if you just out tequila in a sonic slush?
If there is a heaven, that's what it will be. Bagel Bites and cunnilingus.
do you think eating a burger while having sex counts as multitasking skills?
Who is this? I have a text from you last night telling me your name and to train hard for Tuesday, please make this make sense
I just bought spray paint, a T-shirt, and a box of magnum condoms. The cashier refused to make eye contact! Haha
His penis is average but his stamina is amazing!!! I didn’t know I had that many orgasms in my body!!!!
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