Help i just walked in on mom blowing dad
What should our trivia night team be named?
Define Statutory
we've been dating more than a month and i just realized there's no hair on his chest..
you've had sex with him. you must've seen him naked.
nah, i feel like naked sex would be getting too serious for us..
In Denver there are more bars per capita than any other city also the healthiest city. That means lots of drunk girls and no fatties.
For the record it's 1026 and you told me I could leave you in the bathroom.
I'm so covered in bruises. God dammit drunk me. We are a lady.
Morning yack off the fire escape. Girl walking by was mortified. Gooooooooo Ducks!!
I want to be you.
This is my first time seeing you since your lesbian experience. SO EXCITED!
I either just got free sex or a nice jail sentence. Text me in 10 to verify.
Drunkenly bought a $240 realtor course last night. Apparently even drunk me thinks my future is going nowhere
I don't even fuck like that, he just happened to be in the right place at the right drunk.
Remember when we used to go to the bathroom to do drugs together? Now it's to help you with your spanx.
I can't feel the bottom half of my face but i feel like our sex would be amazing
He wanted me to do the rubix cube. He thought it was hot.
The thing about online classes is the prof can't tell this mug is full of beer.
Randomize
