I think I'm in Tiajuana
You are not in Tijuana. I saw you an hour ago
I could be
Is it really that bad? I heard it was like pooping. I like pooping.
Just had to explain to the nurse WHERE I have poison ivy. Great Day
Baffled as to how I'm gonna get 150lbs of sand out of my basement.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
letting you know, as a good neighbor, that when your windows open and your shade is up we can hear and see you dancing naked to money maker... nice boobs
I'm pregaming before our pregaming dinner...with peanut butter and beer. I think I need to re-evaluate my budget...
Just the budget?
If she's telling you consent laws theres probably a reason
I wonder if she thought to herself "I'm gonna sleep with that guy tonight" when she watched me puke on the bar at 3 in the afternoon?
I bought left over pizza from a guy on Craigslist.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Bruh why you gotta judge
You're awake at 3:30 in the morning RSVPing to a musical, I'm well within my means
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed
He was so traumatized by the It's a small world ride but he immediately pulled out a flask from god-knows-where and got drunk before the ride was over. The ride operator didn't blame him.
last time we tried to watch a movie together, we ended up having really aggressive sex. during the Lion King. so what Disney classic will we be ruining this time?
i thought the time we went to a party with no shoes on was bad, how about the time you left with no pants on?
I ripped ass in on and around her face during a hard 69. I don't think she'll ever call me again.
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