Becky drew a cock on my face and is making me sit on the step.
what did you do that she drew a cock on your face and supplemental questions why did you let her?
You sucked the drug dealers dick for a 20 of coke...?
Nooo, I payed for that. I sucked his dick because I had an urge.
Went from beach to class to bar all while wearing my swimsuit as pants. Clearly I'm dressed for success.
not sure if I should be concerned that my brother just stormed into my room and looked at me with a serious face and said, "I'm a peacock, you have to let me fly." oh, vicodin...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i ordered a pipe on amazon, and under recommended items, it gave me a top hat. it knows me better than my parents.
it's a simple rule - pass out shirtless on the couch, become an airsoft target.
I asked him why he was eating an entire can of refried beans, the only answer I got was "revenge"
I would just like to go ahead and accept my slut of the year award.
It's like 10 times better than an Oscar
Yes I am wallowing. There is a significant lack of cookie dough
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yes dating, but it seems easier to just live in a perpetual state of Netflix, internet porn, and cheese.
Got a high five from a Superman stripper tonight
He's 30 years old and woke me up for a hand job. Last time I go home with someone I met through Tinder.
I believe you can. But if you can have rum with breakfast then do that. Definitely do that.
I plan on getting so intoxicated, that I think it's MY own birthday
Can I play this game?
he said "i'm the cat whisperer, watch". he took a hit from the pipe, grabbed the cat and blew the smoke in its ear. he grinned and the cat started purring. it was magnificent
Randomize