I think condoms have that nasty latex smell to remind you in the morning of how gross you are.
wicked high...have munchies. cherry flavor lube. problem solved.
i just called corporate taco bell to ask about the life span of a chicken burrito.
Wow. Thanks for becoming another fan of something on Facebook. You make me want to gouge my eyes out.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I never once brought up his unibrow when he was insulting me. That's class.
Look what our sorority has done to us...we're hitting on girls in hopes of getting an awesome little.
How the fuck did you end up in a tree? With multiple people?
I'm bringing Sergeant Single Slut out this weekend. I hope you're ready for her.
I never actually go in the club. I get in line, hit on a chick, and convince her to come drink all she wants for free at my house.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just check with her if girls can get blown, that's all.
My brother and I have had one conversation in the past like 3 weeks and it was about what it would be like as a sentient butt plug
We cuddled after till the morning. Then he woke up sober... and straight.
I'll bring your "congrats on finally banging" cookies tomorrow, I'm exhausted.
I don't care how hot she was, she wouldn't stop singing "Shut Up and Dance", instant boner-killer.
You said you made a new recipe, but it turned out you just cooked ramen with vodka instead of water.
Randomize