Omg. It looks like a crack pipe exploded in your mouth.
i have some very unhappy turtles in my backseat
So the bartender just told me that there was numerous people who saw me having sex on the rooftop last weekend. +1
I had fun this weekend too. According to Web MD, my symptoms say I had a miscarriage.
It started as a joke and ended with a trip to the emergency room, a broken macbook and a gigantic hole in the concrete of my driveway.
Found him fucking some random drunk chick in the bathrrom at the blue lep with a beer in each hand. had to give him props.
I feel like we shud celebrate your sisters homecoming by having sex in her room
I think a van full of parolees just blew me kisses. Thoughts?
I received a sext from my girlfriend, and a deal for free chips and guacamole at chipotle at the same time. I have tasted heaven, and it is beautiful.
Too bad pet owners lack respect for my training in ancient Buddhist and holistic rehab therapies.
I'm not sure the Buddhist consider pot brownies holistic rehab therapy
I kept having to give myself encouraging advice like, "you know how a path works"
You having your own car has severely reduced the amount of blowjobs I get.
If you send me one more .gif of that fumble, I will make the 10 hour drive just to set you on fire.
Uber driver has left leg up on the dash and turn signal on for about a mile, there's Chipotle wrappers on the floor, but she's hot. 5 stars.
Good morning beautiful! Wanna steal a cat this weekend?
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