Wow that girl who lives a couple houses down is going out wearing butterfly wings a skirt and fishnets
I got fucking wesley sniped last night by that power hoe. How'd it end up on your end? Did you canoodle the stripper enough for her to agree to go to formal?
apparently smacking a customer in the face with his iPhone was not part of the WOW factor we learned in training...
so went to the condom shack today. bought a condom that dresses up your dick in a suit...tomorrow im fucking in style
Just got a lecture from Dad about how I need to be more responsible and start buying my weed in larger quantities so that i can save money. Like he was serious and kind of disappointed in me for not adapting to his method earlier.
We went into lab today and when no one was looking i touched our cadaver's penis!
It never fails.. every time I have a dick in my mouth he calls me.
I'm getting flash backs of last night. They're coming in song form.
doing a walk of shame covered in blue food coloring is only embarrassing if you make it embarrassing...actually no its embarrassing on all accounts
She just drunkenly falls over and yells " I lost my footing!" in a british accent and then proceeds to run into the wall... did you spike her water?
I was mid hand job and stopped me because he wanted to "connect" which meant putting his thumb in between my eyebrows and a hand over my heart and closing our eyes...
At 12:16 am. We just got out of the truck and went behind it and fucked. With 3 people in the truck. On the side of the road. As cars drove by.
You know for a guy who frequently jumps into stuff without thinking it through, your can do spirit is lacking on this one
Last time I "ran into him" I ended up with the clap and had to explain why the ladder was missing from the garage.
ready for a night of bad decisions, horrible moral standards, and an unhealthy amount of illegal substances.
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