she just sneezed while going down on me. is it rude for me to ask her to do it again?
i can't believe i had my finger in that
Things I've learned: after you move in with a girl it's much less satisfying to wipe your dick on her sheets after sex because now they're your sheets too
So two questions...why am I covered in muffins and are there pictures of this.
My mom is helping me re-arrange my room to make New Year's more hook-up friendly
John stretched a condom over his face and tried to puke in it.
The Vegas crew is in two groups, Team Vodka and Team Fireball. There is no winner in this.
After seeing how much you are able to funnel in a night, I am 90% sure your blood is pure gin.
They got me high and left me at the mall with a giftcard for $400. I need an adult.
I'm not sending you pictures to jack off to. That's not what friends do
The words "me," "sober," and "new years eve" do not go together. Ever.
Judging by the progress I've made since I woke up (none) I'm thinking this hangover may keep me in bed.
Talked to the dude for a hour . I now know where he lives, his occupation, his goals, his dreams and what his dick looks like.
Jesus fucking Mary Christ if I have to clean shit out of my fucking bathtub one more fucking time I'm gonna murder a fucking kitten
I don't remember anything from last night, but at track I found my thong next to the high jump pit... So it must has been decent
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