I'm at the bar with Ashley what should I do?
humiliate her
the mole on his forehead could get me off better than his dick
please tell me you have proof of this
My Yahoo Answers account was suspended. Apparently I answered "I like chicks who do anal" to over 100 questions last night.
I just egged your windshield and it froze on contact. Have fun with that.
I'm high, and her 2,100 tagged pictures annoy me even MORE. I wish it had a google searchbar so I could type in "cleavage pics" to get to the point.
MRIs the morning after St. Patty's Day was a poor choice.
Hes sobering up now. He was just really bad for like 45 minutes. He cried while he was telling me how he pictured us eating hotdogs on the beach together..
He gave up on mugging us when Dave wouldn't stop laughing. He was wiggling his finger at the knife and making baby noises and giggling. The guy just walked away.
My poor liver. I drank enough on NYE to sustain an alcohol addiction for the entirety of 2015.
Well, we 69'd in the Jacuzzi. If that tells you the kind of night I had. Neither of us knew we could hold our breath that long. Deff. Most. Dangerous. Sex. Ever.
we will now reference it as "the infamous double dick night"
Is there a reason drunk me put drunk you's phone in the freezer?
Welp, no use in crying over spilt milk. I can't unbang her.
That song just makes me wanna take off my top and shake my titties all around the club.
It's a shame I've been hooking up with him for 6 months and he still doesn't know my real name.
Randomize
