id fuck shawn from boy meets world only if we could name the baby topanga.
I wish all the girls i wanted to sleep with knew how big my dick was then id have a better chance
every time fb tells me a dude i fucked is now friends with another dude ive fucked, i die a little inside. thats way more honesty than im comfortable with.
i'm sad. The beetle crawled away. I was only trying to get him stoned.
She ended up puking in the bathroom. But she's a good drunk... i told her to stay in there so i could dance til the club closed. She was still in the stall an hour later.
I said we should get a taxi and you were waving down cars, three of which were cops and one of them slowed down and shook his head then kept driving
He didn't think we needed a taxi
As I'm trying to leave her house she shushes me and puts my hand on her boob, then goes back to sleep. In like 30seconds. What the fuck.
also dude totally apologize for the whole drunken "want something in my mouth" text
Who knows. I'd probably only get a makeout with an OTPHJ from her so the return on sexual investment from her isn't looking that great.
We hooked up and then we watched game of thrones while he fed me chocolate. I don't see how our benafriendship is a bad thing.
My mom legitimately hired a private eye on me. DO YOU KNOW HOW EXCITING MY LIFE JUST GOT???
He said I was really mad at him on Friday. Dude I fell asleep in all my clothes and shoes, with my flashlight on, on my phone... I could have been mad at the wall. It wasn't my classiest day.
I need to reevaluate my stance on weekday hangovers...
I honestly didn't think living in Canada would change me, until I found myself watching hockey porn
My saturday night consisted of sewing my Halloween costume and watching Blues Clues
You actually...sewed your costume?
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