i guess it's bad bediquette to quote the kool aid man
?
he said oh yeah and i responded with OHH YEAHHHHH!
The only reason I kept his number in my phone for so long is so that hed pay for my abortion.
I just told you I can't. My fingers are melting. I have discovered the high.
I'm spoon feeding myself tequila for breakfast, should we skip class today?
Just remembered seeing jalepenos in my vomit last night. Reminded me to thank you for sharing your queso with me. You're a good friend.
No you don't understand. This tree is really alive. Like in Pocahontas.
What's his name?? He crossfits 6 times a week, works in finance & is into the occasional felony class drug. His name is irrelevant in order to know if I wanna bone him again.
I'm sorry if you weren't drunk enough to be peer pressured into the naked dancing/group make out that transpired last night
And anyway at least being paid in opium makes a cool story
Had the best sex Thursday night then Friday night I met his girlfriend. The worst thing is we became friends like she gave me her number.
yea plus he's gonna be wearing his gumby costume so that'll take a lot of pressure off too
Apparently I offered the cop my Taco Bell.
Desperate times...
His condition for us having sex was that I wore my show boots. #equestrianproblems
Ya, It's probably because whenever I close my eyes I see a kitten playing a banjo.
I don't remember anything beyond the drinking game but I woke up in my own pee this morning so I'm just gonna go out on a limb and say I overdid it.
Randomize
