so then you didnt wanna fuck tonight right?
oops, you werent supposed to get that until you left.
He spelled "beautiful" wrong in his text
yeah, but that could mean anything in Denmark.
yeah but I shoulda known it\'d be bad when he start rubbing my pubic bone instead of the clit! Awkkkkwarddd
nothing as in nothinggggg kills the mood for me is when a girl with 4 cm nipple hair
k so who do I think I'm kidding applying to culinary school? I just fucked up a microwaveable pizza
i called my brother from the living room and paid him a dollar to turn off the light in my room. ive hit rock bottom
my cup is half full, half full of rum.
im youtubing treadmill accidents. this is what i do at 2:10am
Come over we're celebrating the one month anniversary of her first 4/20
I just love it. It's warm and soft and the rest of the world is so mean. My bed would never be mean to me
Hey guys guess what I found in my bed this morning? I wish it was a man..but it was a potato
My neighbor is burning all of her ex's things in a metal drum outside the window. Guess who's going to make a new friend?
Attention, i sprayed windex on me to disguise the scent of sex and regret off my clothes from last night
Do you think Root Touch Up or Just for Men would work better on pubes?
Randomize
