took acid and went on safebus. all the lights were off except the adds. swear to god it was a submarine
It's 3am, i just got back from ht e bars and registered for classes larteeeeee. History of baseball at 8am? at least ill meet the only stragiht gusy at NYU!
Medical school killed my enjoyment of porn. Hard to keep a boner when you're diagnosing all the actor's STDs and skin disorders.
so apparently i worked out for over an hour last night. drinking is the only way i will ever get anything done
I honestly didn't see the problem playing beer pong In the car on the road trip home.
ya she's here .. it looks like she just gave up and passed out on the floor
The a/c is broken so they cut a softball size whole in the freezer door. Goodbye deposit.
You better not fucking die before we have sex while you blow fire. I'm serious. Don't mess up my sexual bucket list.
Did not foresee holding down food at work today to be a struggle today
I can pinpoint my loss of innocence as the moment I started masturbating with my teddy bears
I invited you and you fucked me in the face with the penis of disappointment and shit.
I had very briefly met him a few years ago. My friend was tired of hearing us both complain about being horny. She figured she would fuck two birds with one stone.
Is it bad if I look at someone i dont know and just want to punch them in the face?
I feel fine lol. I tried climbing a tree but the branch broke and I got arrested.
Wow you are like a taller more attractive sex Yoda.
Randomize
