wicked high...have munchies. cherry flavor lube. problem solved.
i'm going through the NYU 2014 group looking for future drunken hookups. too slutty?
$1.99 mimosas n bloodys til 3. Happy hour starts at 4. We're gonna ride the mechanical bull to kill the hour inbetween.
Please take video.
He is offering to pay me back by sending me a dick pic.
.......................................
My thoughts exactly.
I know I should be focused on nurturing their bright little minds but it's 10 a.m. and I need a cock in my mouth
I've decided to be proactive and make a sex playlist on my phone to avoid any awkward moments in my upcoming slutty summer
Is it really road head if took place on kayaks in the river?
Hootey the Owl eats a mean pussy.
Um, OK. WTF?
The guy from the Halloween party. We finally hooked up. Went down in me for 45 mins. Came 4 times.
You are a special snowflake. A special snowflake I wouldn't mind rough sex with
I've been watching porn with my cat lately. No shame
We got drunk and crashed a fifty year old woman's birthday party for the food. Whoops.
This bird just went for my eyes. Does he think I'm dead???
STOP GETTING GIRLS PREGNANT IN MY BED.
I learned a valuable lesson about combining day drinking with malt liquor: you may think you have super powers, but that's just the Steel Reserve talking.
Were you the one who yelled "FOR GLORYHOLE!" then punched a hole through my door?
Randomize
