They wont let us in. Theyve some sort of no Daft Punk costume rule
You drew a lightning bolt on your eye and stomach in eye liner and made me sing Poker face with you in harmonies. I never knew you were still a music major when you were drunk.
I didnt realize til after I got out of her apartment and into the lobby that we lived in the same building.
I just want to apologize for screaming when I saw you the other day. It's just that you looked really gross and I was high.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So I feel bad, Ross is asking questions, I think they need to know it's a Spanish lesbian bar
Did you get the "i have a yeast infection from that wet frat bathroom floor" text?
In a cab. Towels everywhere. Confused.
He came for an unexpected visit and let's just say I shattered his illusion that girls don't watch porn
Now that I'm hitting my bong, I realized I haven't missed something so much in a long time. I love Thomas the Dank Engine.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Marking my student's "don't do drugs" posters while simultaneously texting my dealer, is this what being a grown up is like?
we got kicked out of the bar last night for sneaking into the back kitchen and eating handfulls of cheese in the walk in fridge
I've had sex near too many of the blankets to let our parents touch them like this
just had an acid flashback in my therapist's office. i am a walking stereotype
So today was the first day i've been sober since Wednesday according to my roommate!
I've been eaten out in coupes, sedans, trucks, suv's, you name it. If I can do it in a smart car, you can do it in a vw beetle.
I knew you were the expert on doing it in public. You need to get paid for your advise
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