that's just what I need...drunk ass people throwin hatchets in the dark.
TYLER... glimpse of last night: leather chaps, guacamole dip, a jump rope, spray paint, and rhinestone studded pajamas.
i think you have the wrong number... but your story sounds delightful.
He keeps the condoms in his bible. I guess stairs or elevator, we're getting to hell one way or another.
she got pretty angry when i tried to superglue her fingers together.
We fucked on top of all of our English papers in celebration of the semester ending.
It wasn't a threesome, it was me making out with one while looking at the other one screaming "does this make you jealous?"
That's the first time I've ever heard something that tickled both my gag reflex and my penis simultaneously.
I realized I was totally the dude in that hook up. I came first and didn't wanna help him finish. And he had paisley sheets.
We walked in and someone handed her an unopened bottle of jack with her name on it. She's like a drunken celebrity.
Is it okay to send him a "thanks for the sexual awakening" note?
Thanksgiving day drinking ended up with me in a shopping cart screaming where are the bitches and condoms. I'd say it went well.
why isn't there a kind of gay where i let guys give me head but they don't expect me to give it back? i could be that kind of gay
He was that good?
I named my Roomba after my pot dealer. I have a problem, don't i?
Ive seen a birth plenty of times, pretty awesome like a bear trying to climb out of a volkswagon.
Is it weird that my mother is taking body shots off my gf after meeting once?
Randomize