even iPhones love lady gaga. everytime I type haha it trys to correct it to gaga. this is bullshit...
every time fb tells me a dude i fucked is now friends with another dude ive fucked, i die a little inside. thats way more honesty than im comfortable with.
Their car went through the first bag of wine on the drive up...clearly 6 bags was not enough.
Like my mouth was on his pelvis connected to his balls that's how far it was
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
REWARD BLOWJOB!! STAY RIGHT WHERE YOU ARE I'LL BE THERE IN FIVE MINUTES.
It took me three days, but I managed to nearly get arrested on my way out of LA. Made it to the airport. Crisis averted, though. The real crime is, my flight is delayed two hours.
she stole my Timberlands and my Sublime shirt and left her heels and bra. this is war
She posted a pic of her bf on ig wishing him a happy bday at midnight. She then proceeded to have sex with me. Who is the bday boy again?
The spirit of America is being too hungover to celebrate America right?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Did body shots with a guy... Ended up being the ref of my volleyball game... So that's why we won
I was alternating between saying "yall need Jesus" and "God bless" the entire night
I sent her a video on Snapchat of me cumming, with a Father's Day snap filter that said "#1 Dad".
maybe i should limp back to therapy...
oh yeah will you also bring home vodka i wanna do shots on the roof
last night i was way too drunk and i was forcing people to let me tell them about mammals
Imagine we only get one cock for the rest of your life. I’d pick his dick. That good!
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