So he says "lean over this" which is a chain across the doorway, held into the wall with bolts. I do. Then he puts his weight on top of me to try and get it in.
It breaks. We fall.
I now have a broken nose, a concussion, and an infected, split lip. Why do I have the worst luck in guys?
So I made him an imaginary sandwich and told him that the day I didn't have to fake it, neither would he.
Well I put her head right through the headboard. Thank god the room was under her name.
So he didn't pull out. And I like flipped out. And the he told me to chill and opened up a drawer full of packs of Plan B and handed me one.......
A friday night jus isn't the same if the cops don't raid my dorm
He's tryingto open a beer with a Police baton. Cut him off or see where this leads?
The party went downhill once the fire department had to be called to put out the kitchen fire.
Well, let's see..I held him while he cried for 30-40 minutes, woke up on his couch AND he gave me a ride home in his underwear. Shit show is not even the half of it.
I have so many plans for this weekend and sobriety is not invited.
I shaved my pussy for you. If you complain about a single hair that I missed again, you will be greeted by a bush the next time you go down on me and i will MAKE YOU KEEP GOING
You said you liked how I put the cream cheese on.
You know you are high when you are so glad it wasn't your freshly buttered raisin bread that fell on your foot. It was your $400 Ipod
Ims textiofg thsi woht my noes bcuz my hansd aer stli handcuffde to teh bedfrme. Help me
Probably gonna run and pray I throw up. Then go get a coffee/bagel & continue to rally
EVERYBODY CALM YOUR SHIT
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