he said i'm too pretty to suck penis
I made myself breakfast and everything and then whoever's house it actually was came downstairs very upset.
It's like a choose-your-own-adventure. But the adventure is already chosen for you. And it sucks.
hes so high that he's convinced hes a duck. hes squating in the bathtub quacking. that was NOT JUST pot.
He was wearing his Class of 2007 shirt so I sat there for 5 minutes and read all the names of the guys I can remember giving head to.
the tile , carpet , walls , cabinets , even the ceiling ... there is Jello everywhere
it was your idea to have indoor Jello wrestling man
And then I asked the bartender for my third shot and he told me he had to cut me off at two because this was in fact a family fun center
Sorry I dragged you across a parking lot
According to this USDA thing I just read, I should either get upper respiratory issues or begin to bleed from my nose and mouth.
I don't mean to ruin your favorite Disney movie...but...we both came when Mufasa died.
Eating an ice cream sandwich while your little bro gets me weed. May I adopt him?
I was on my way last night when some asshole yelled "make better life choices" out the window of his car. I felt so self conscious I went home.
That's the last time I get in a car with six rappers headed to god knows where.
I don't care. She's the only girl to make me feel like my face is melting when she blows me.
I am the oldest one here and I STILL feel like I need an adult. help.
Randomize
