margs and chips and queso make the world go round
well and inertia
Ambien. No doubt about it.
i want to bang the Snorg tees girl.. shes always smiling ;)
when im bored during the day i often think, what do people who dont get high do with their day.. i came to the conlcusion that everyone must be getting high
The guy in front of me in line at Starbucks looks kinda like Danica Patrick except he has a huge boner.
xbox live and facebook are tricking me into believing I actually have an active social life
It says a lot about how well I know you when I can understand messages of yours that say things like "sauteed Jesus."
laying naked on couch sucking water through straw. i can still feel the orgasm from last night. thank you mdma.
Yesterdays boozy weather forecast has been extended to today
diet's not working. come over. i need someone to fuck the hungry out of me.
Thanks for letting me rent out your vagina rec room. I don't expect the security deposit back.
It's so hard to fall asleep when I can hear your genitals smacking against hers. I hate you with all the love in my heart.
Just told my roommate about "analvice" and she is horrified and the Sound of Music is ruined.
in fetal position in his closet not sure if he knows im here... hugging his spongebob cake pan i stole.... now please come find me..
I've literally slept one hour I'm honestly just surprised you can insult me this early
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