Just try to lay there and not be pregnant.
For once I'd like to have a Taco Sunday without having some random drunk chick flee my house half naked and in tears.
He kept spanking me and talking about biomedical science.
Aw, you fucked a pre-med? you're moving up in the world!
yea man just watch out- theres a shitload of broken glass in your bed
at the last minute we also decided to throw an egg in the beer bong. and he drank it, shell and all.
the water pistols in the freezer are full of voddka.
Tonights drinking will be celebratory and victorious. Picture the end of The Mighty Ducks set to beer.
His hands kept asking for sex, but all I could think was "dude, this is going to ruin my high".
If we could give a gymnastic score to drunken nights, I would be a part of the Fab Five.
You were laying in a hotel bed drinking beer from a straw while you demanded everyone to kiss your foot tattoo.
"Yeah because the first thing I think of when I hear the word college is tear gas."
They filled a kiddie pool with lube and glitter.
We were all having a bath, the three of us, then that drug dealer guy walked in and peed. Sitting down. Apparently he didn't want to offend us.
Scary. I hope people take me seriously. Maybe I should black out less to be sure
I admire the fact that you replicated my apartment on the roof but I would appreciate it more if you would move all my stuff off the roof and back into my apartment.
Randomize
