I'm pretty sure his head is too big to fit between my legs. Worthless.
If you get a breast reduction, you have to let me see them before hand at least once. It's a rule.
Sweater Vest, Chin Strap, Beard, sporting a white Beret- Please don't ever let me be THAT guy.
Is it because I queefed?
he sounded really stupid. it was like his puke had a stutter, too.
So someone just pointed out to me that during dinner, I mentioned more women that I'm attracted to than men. The transition might be complete. I'm gay.
I told your dad we had a nice lunch and hung out for awhile. It seemed more appropriate than "I had a bite of his canned chili and then we ripped each others clothes off."
Just the amount of girls he locked himself in my room woth says your gonna have to take a cab bro. I don't think he's going anywhere
Mehhh. I just tried to type 'extremely', and it auto corrected to 'creek rot'. IT KNOWS WHAT I LOOK LIKE
wrestling a boy for fruit? sounds suspiciously like foreplay...
His girlfriends signaled their approval by pulling me off of him and in turn making out with me. I think I will hang out with this group more often
New vibrator arrived today.
How was it?
Who are these wee mortals we call men?
I think I’ve reached sophomore-year-level of bad ideas
and you know that’s the highest possible level because it’s when I met you
I went to my AA meeting last night. My drug dealer is now my counselor.
Reverse road head. Sa-witch!!!
Randomize
