I got fucking wesley sniped last night by that power hoe. How'd it end up on your end? Did you canoodle the stripper enough for her to agree to go to formal?
she cant drink. allergic to alcohol.
ewwww. she might as well have a dick.
Babe! I just farted and I swear to jesus lord christ that it sounded like ur name! Ok, more like Meeatt but still... awesome.
similar to the time we made up the game of screaming at the top of our lungs any time a guy any of us slept with walked into the party. that went over SO well.
he saw my boobs and came all over himself... there goes my whole night.
He dumped me and I don't wanna fuck his best friend for revenge. Is this what maturity feels like?
Bro what are you doing Thursday the day before I go to jail??
.As long as you're some how patriotic with your sexual escapades, I can support it.
The guy I blew last night was pierced in multiple places. I had to use extra caution to avoid my temporary filling.
You are one with the wind and sky, bro.
Totally on the hot mess express last night. Mom said I was passed out on her kitchen floor. Told her I was drinking genuine tea.
I smoked too much. I'm sitting on my balcony and I keep getting lost. Help me
HAMMERED.. I made a peanut butter and jelly sandwich with toilet paper instead of bread...
How much glitter would I have to ingest in order for a "magnificent" amount to appear in my ejaculate?
honestly performing my own hysterectomy would hurt less than my cramps right now.
Randomize
