And hes hitting me with his balls, really hard.
She gave me a handjob while eating a mcdouble with mayo on the way home from the bars at 2 in the morning. Car was full of people. This could be forever
one of them held the wheel while the other one changed her pants. while driving. on the thruway. what
Wackin it to the USA womens soccer team. My own personal way of saying job well done.
She was puking in a plastic bag while cleaning where she puked on the floor. She knows how to multitask.
Just warning you the last time I had captain Morgan I gave a blow job to a guy that looked like Jesus.
Well it's official... The first guy I ever gave head to now holds 2 world records. Should I text him asking if I can try and break my record?
We were so drunk that when I broke the bottom off a pint glass we decided to make it into a candle holder. How does that happen?!
They said you bought the guy a shot and was talking about being Greek and then all of the sudden just puked all in their pitcher of beer and got kicked out of the bar.
Maybe I'm nitpicking, but that looked more like how one would jerk off an elephant than it did playing air guitar.
So I can officially say that someone has licked whipped cream off my nipples. Go senior year
lets go to sea world and you can just hit on every guy in a wetsuit until you get lucky
He stopped mid sex to pour wine in my mouth...
Marry him.
Get over here asap there are three naked girls two bottles of whiskey and only one of me
Hey the moment you step into my house, find me IMMEDIATELY so we can pinky promise on not roping anyone at the party into yet another threesome
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