I cant wait to get the disapproving look from this elderly black lady...
Thats a flattering suggestion doug but lets be clear NO you may not put your face in my vagina just because ur not charging me a cover. sorry.
The sex was so good, I called my ex during the 2nd time just so he could hear. Is that mean?
You were in the corner dancing by yourself yelling "I look good", when really you looked ridiculous and drunk
I just saw the nastiest chick.
Where?
woke up next to her... fuck you jack daniels, fuck you
i had to do the walk of shame dressed as a leprechaun. I have never been more proud of my irish roots.
finally stumbled home. 4am. made it to the bathroom and threw up. the cat came in,s aw me, looked at the vom in disgust, and then threw up too. its nice to have such sympathetic pets.
You should know me better than that. I don't whore around. I promise this is a blowjobs only kind of trip.
Honey, I don't care how "classic you" this is. It's not gonna matter if we can't find you in the morning.
Based on the time of Sean's "I'm on your street" phone call last night, we had sex for an hour and a half. Man, time flies when you're getting boned to an orgasmic death.
You meet the best people naked in a hot tub at 2 am.
PLEASE HELP ME THE AMERICANS ARE YELLING ABOUT TURKEY, I DON'T KNOW WHAT TO DO
My liver can't handle being unemployed!
i just want things to go smoothly
oh they won't lmao
I'm pretty sure I have PMS because I almost just cried about not being able to find a place that gives acrobat classes here.
Randomize
