I just got three quarters of the way there before I realized I was way too stoned for class so I bought a smoothie and walked home.
i just saw someone crawling up the stairs to the dorm while screaming "i have the best vagina!"
we took turns throwing up in the kitchen sink last night...no i am not doing the dishes
Our cab driver just admitted to beating up kids in the 60's who didn't smoke pot...
our conversations pretty much only consist of the phrase 'fuck you'. and the sex is fantastic. we've got a great thing going here.
Yeah I should probably start planning our first conversation instead of our first child.
Well I tried to call you. I was convinced my body was made of wood. But the Xmas lights in my room helped
I'm drinking straight vodka and railing lines of adderall while writing a paper about the nature of Jesus. It's 6:50 in the morning. College.
I didn't even realize I grinded on a security guard last night. Shit. Did he at least like it?
I just looked at your pics on Facebook....there was cake? Where the fuck was I!?
Running errands with mom, cool. Coming to pleasures with mom for her valentines night, not ever in a million years cool.
I just scored a new eye doctor and a date all in one email. BOOM!
bitch i am allowed to be rude i just fought cold hard porcelain with my face
Knowing how to carefully mix my vices has to be the #1 skill I've gotten from pharmacy school
I wanna riverboat gamble on your vaginal waters. Just sayin
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