Dude, TWO hot chicks on jeopardy tonight. gonna be a good one
Dude, I am so turned on right now. Hot chick with glasses from brooklyn is absolutely crushing right now, taking whole categories. might beat off to jeapordy...
do another line during during the commercial and make the magic happen during double jeopardy.
yea and when she crawled to her room she yelled at a bookbag to "get the fuck out my way"
so i had a hang over on saturday and i stayed in the shower for 4 hours, then crawled out, skimpered to my bed, and some kid i didnt know was sleeping in it
Dude I could put my dick between the gap in her teeth.. This is the last time we are hanging out with Kentucky girls
I stayed up for hours making sure you didnt pass out in a mountain of your own puke. But when I heard you yell AWWWW FUUCCKK, somehow I knew everything would be ok
The last thing I remember was talking about the economic viability of cock ring manufacturing... we had some good ideas
When the doctor said the anal leakage might not be reversible without some lifestyle changes you start asking if it's worth the entertainment value.
Dad just showed up on someone else's golf cart, filled an ice chest with booze and left while yelling "SHINANIGANS!!!!" this is going no where fast.
be right there i have to get my cape
He jizzed all over my ID badge. HR is gonna be pissed...
Simple revenge plan: break into his house and steal one shoe of every pair
I was told that I need a reference for my blow job skills. Be expecting a phone call tomorrow.
But I am still fully ok with my life choices as long as the consequences aren't onesies and pacifiers
I can't give advice right now, I have a yeast infection.
I’m honestly just flattered that you think I could make PornHub’s Top 10.
Randomize