I was about to go down on her and her dong flopped out and hit me in the chin. This may have a Nam like post-traumatic-stress-disorder effect on me.
the party we crashed was not a party. the party we crashed was jens grandads funeral.
i was about to cum until he started doing shrek impressions.
Also got home. Still stoned. Mom was up. We made a pizza and were writing a children's book. Sleep good.
She kept throwing quarters at him and yelling "Goooaaallll!!" whilst taking her clothes off one by one. I'd say she had a good night
Although I feel like awkward kinda describes your entire sexual history...
I like literally had a visual image of his penis going into your soul
Seriously can I go through one convo where masturbating doesn't come up
A guy was over-the-skirt fingering me on the dance floor and I stopped him to sensually rap in his ear. So that was my Halloweekend
I just sent my ex off to a party, threw a condom at him, and told him to make good choices.
I feel like one thing if I have going for me is that my bed looks like a nice place to have sex
I know I swore I wouldn't go home with him, but he whispered that he had taquitos and you know how much drunk me loves taquitos.
Dude, I got drunk and sexted his little sister by accident
I swear to god he thought my ass was a bag of wine last night.
i'm drinking soco out of a mickey mouse cup right now. i love it when college and my childhood meet in the middle.
Randomize
