: south campus drug res life name erik. Love, tran
i wanna stay in my bed and fart for a few more hours
Just got booed while taking a piss and asked if I 'call that a penis.' Get me the fuck out nf yankee stadium.
this girl ate taco bell on my bed naked last night, it was the sexiest thing ive ever seen
Springtime is officially here. I just used pool water to fill up the bong
I learned the names of so many hookups when they read them at graduation
we got cut off at 8 am. He spilled his drink three times on the plane. this should be one hell of a vegas trip
she sent me pictures of 3 different vaginas and if I could pick which one was hers i could sleep with her.
I was always good at matching as a child.
I forgot to tell you about my 7:30am Sunday morning run to the local convenience store to buy condoms, a du-rag and a shot glass
How was your weekend?
The sex was so good. It hurts to exist.
I am very happy to share that the hospital says the testicle pain is normal and that they are going to take care of it.
Come to this bar
But I'm full of food.
MAKE ME FULL OF YOUR DICK
Her son walked into the middle of the living room, took off his diaper, shit on the floor, smiled at me, and walked out, as if nothing happened.
So date night went well?
That was a beautiful concert to sleep through ...
I know - Don't let me take drugs from strangers anymore
Your heart isn't making stupid decisions... your penis is outsmarting your brain. Stop fucking her!
Randomize