So I said to her: one time i broke my dick and when they took off the cast i could cum across a baseball field
i saw the 3rd guy i ever had sex with last night and kept calling him #3
grilled cheese. we just shotgunned grilled cheese.
can you pick up eggs and chocolate sauce on your way home?
what kind of party is this?
the best kind ever
This show inspires me to have sex in space
As long as there aren't any pictures of me humping the penguin, we are good,
I'm pretty sure that when my parents bought me those savings bonds they thought it would go towards something useful like tuition. Not your bail.
I told you I'd buy you lunch.
The Deck is crawling with Cougars. Sound the irresponsibility alarm and come drink with me on a Tuesday night.
I just saw a black chick with an eyepatch. This is a once in a lifetime opportunity.
Naw, the sex dungeon had to come down so we could build a nursery. Cause and effect really.
I have to stop letting him stay all weekend. I feel like a cored apple.
I think there is a legit party going on the place we thought was AA
Mom is talking about dicks with her friends in the living room. I am 5 seconds away from scaling the bathroom window out of here.
No, you are in the clear. The police officer finally just said "I give up" and walked away.
I made soup. Now I'm having post soup making wine. I had pre soup making wine also.
Randomize
