what did you hear about me?
that you are a very nice girl and a pleasure to be around
that was hard to say and not laugh
Totally forgot this... How weird was it when they were licking our faces
I'll probably just lay on my couch bra-less sipping wine out of a straw so I don't have to lift my head.
Its ok. Im having a low day. About to mix cake mix with milk and drink it.
He came over drunk in a speedo i told him he has my vote he said who are you voting for when i said obama he took off running and shouting i was worthless like an empty beer can
Are you coming to class or was the dick pic this morning your way of saying not today?
Woke up, moved an empty handle of fireball to spit blood, then put the morning cigarette out in it.
If its possible to have a hickey on your nipple, I have one. Thank you.
I need an IV, a new head, and stronger morals.
With 4 extra seconds dedicated to the dong.
These kind of text worry me.
Maybe you can just make seal noises during sex and we can call it good
New vibrator arrived today.
How was it?
Who are these wee mortals we call men?
Who told you that acid and Jurassic World was a good idea?
dont remember, but I'm pretty sure I was convinced that the hybrid dinosaur was satan the whole time. It was actually very spiritual
That's why god made go-pro's and tequila
I used your vibrator when you were out of town. Now I know why you always come out of your room smiling.
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