hotel room ftw
i think i have two assholes
i love that when i tell my kids and grandkids about how we first met it will be about this little thing called a "poke" on facebook
He booked his flight from Dallas already, no ticket to the game, said hes gonna bang some girl at tailgait to get a ticket, I had to explain that it will be sub 20 degrees F during tailgate, he decided to come in july instead, Texans are dumb.
After the tests come back negative, you guys will look back on this evening with fond memories...
She just left after she spent the past 2.5 hours fuckin the shit out of me. I'll put that in the logbook as a cross country
cliffnotes. writing studyguide on last pack of smokes. glad this semester is over.
I'm just going to lay in a blanket cocoon of self pity for the next few months.
Spent 20mins wondering why my roommate wouldn't answer after we were pounding on the door.....Def went to the wrong building.
I don't think the TSA would be too happy. Who knows if three ounces of lube will be enough for us?
There was this blissful moment of peace and quiet... then you ran past our window with a lit firecracker in hand going, "SHIT. SHIT. SHIT!"
Facebook is for cat videos and having better lives than people from high school, period.
Please god tell me you aren't pregaming your date alone.
Ooooh no. Jesus take the wheel, or Moses. SOMEBODY TAKE THE WHEEL
Yep. Just fucked a 34 year old on the football field where we both went to high school. That's a story for the grandkids.
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