You really need to tell him that he has a girlfriend. I'm not sure he knows
Great News, you CAN smoke bowls with a magnifying glass
Just did my hair and make up at mcdonalds so we're in the same boat.
There is a pube in my fucking eyeball
Dear room mates I tried to shotgun pam in the kitchen. It is slippery. Please be careful. That is all. Love you.
It's a self-perpetuating puke chain.
You may have graduated college on time, but my 6th year ass gets to see awesome tits every day just for showing up.
i think i have weasels eating my brain. Also there is a skeleton staring at me from the back of the bathroom door. it's an awkward vomit. come find me please
Dude, this guy showed up with a 40 and stayed for two days. I want that lack of responsibility
Dude he fell into my wall and left an imprint then decided to have sex with the door open. Vents carry noise pretty well
Whatever you didn't send me pics of you topless making bacon
BING! You are now free to move about my panties. He just left for work.
I want to but I can't have a boner while doing a install and working with a customer
She showed me her tits outside Taco Bell....After she flashed the dude working there in an effort to get in.
Dude, putting on underwear straight out of the dryer is the greatest thing ever. It feels like I wrapped my vagina in a warm blanket.
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