so how does one go about finding a summer fling?
take advantage of an intern
I just read the lonely terrorist on nwa had 40 more friends than me on facebook
I've been watching anime, masturbating and eating nutella for three days. I hope she never comes back.
pregamed for the floor meeting. so stoned. i keep thinking my RA is shrinking.
I have a feeling she doesn't appreciate me as a person. She only fucks me because I look like Harry Potter.
Just thinking about this summer makes me feel a slight tingle of an orgasm mixed with a twinge of regret as the cold ghostly feeling of multiple hangovers creep into my body.
We can stop fighting if you send me a picture of your dick standing at full attention wearing a sock.
I'll wait.
It can also be a hat.
I consider any night I don't make out with someone a bad night. So I've been great.
let’s be honest I’d fucking Irish step dance on your grave, asshole
Good god you suck at this wake up call. Seriously. If I can, after consuming enough vodka to subdue a russian soldier, muster up enough motivation to call you in the morning and send you naked pictures the least you could do is pick up.
he's just got his life so together and it makes my pussy wet.
Alcohol won't break your heart. I mean, unless it's all gone maybe
I think someone is dead in a car across the street
Scratch that, dude's getting a blow job
All I want is to get shitfaced and fuck random strangers is that really to much to ask?
You fucked him, didn’t you?
He showed up at my house with tacos, rum and a negative Covid test. Of course I fucked him. I’m just a simple girl that likes tacos, not Margaret Thatcher!
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