Very drunk. laura says hi. i can't find my pants. i think i'm in philly, but it might be jersey somewhere
my entire walk over here no one looked in my eyes. Period Boobs are BAACKKK.
My entire floor is waiting for the couple to come out of the shower. She's a screamer. We've blockaded them
they shut off the water. shaving my legs with soda. that desperate.
Honestly, It follows the same rules as Cock Roulette.
they night at the roxbarryed us. came out of nowhere,bought us shots, and then the big one licked my hand? we got out of that noise.
So I realized I was officially over him when I was getting a lap dance on the keg bus at 3am from his old boss and I was double fisting:)
Just start grabbing cocks. It can't go wrong! Just say you thought you knew him and wanted to check.
I think my uterus is still laying in your bed somewhere under the covers.
I think that's the key to being an adult though... Get those rapid fire beer shits out I the way early, then you can go about your grown man business
What happens at the gay bar stays at the gay bar. Except that I sold my panties for $100. People should know that.
He showed up at my house, drunk, proclaiming that he needed to fuck me...my dad let him in
Hey, if I'm gonna bastard a child and ruin his life, I'm going balls out.
If it wasn't for the fact that I drink during my lunch break I'm pretty sure I would have quit this job by now
Ah, drunk me ordered sushi at 3 a.m. for sober me's lunch the next day. EXCELLENT
Randomize
