question: from what angle do you give a hand job. im confused..
apparently vodka and oj turns green when you throw it up
basic color theory
Hashbrowns don't come out your nose as easily as you would think
when she said she was from California you started sobbing. You begged her not to melt your popsicle because you paid good money for it and you just wanted to eat it in peace.
Fine then. I'll just do all this coke on my own this weekend and die. It'll be strictly your fault.
Sorry 4 leaving u in the dumpster last night
I thought she was being abused so tried to go in at the sympathy angle, but the bruises were from pole dancing. I went in at all angles.
Yes, you can 69 in a fiat. But I think I have permanent nerve damage
I'm having salsa con queso and a leftover half-drank/flat red bull for breakfast. Nothing you propose doing today would be a downgrade.
I basically have sex lined up for me in three different countries. If that's not a feat I don't know what is
Yeah man... I ordered donuts, drank wine, and cried to a movie with Seth Rogen in it. Do you really think I have my shit together?
I cant go through life without knowing what ginger pubes actually look like
Fucking adderall I just talked at the security guard for 90 minutes
I asked him to have birthday sex with me via xbox live
Let's just face it you're going to have an arrangement with your future wife your fuck me on Thursdays
Randomize
