Yo I'm just eating dinner now. U ready to go out?
Ya ya. Where you eating?
Cereal and beer. U kno u want in.
Dude I just witnessed a midget touching himself and singing the chorus to somebodys watching me by michael jackson... it kinda turned me on
My cock was attacked by outdoor plants
that john and kate plus 8 dude has ruined asians for me
Showering in the handicapped shower. Im THAT hungover.
We need to get her some penis inspired head protection.
Chick took off her bra in the middle of class cuz it was "too hot." How's going out of state feel now?
Yeah we call her cincohandjabos because she gave 5 guys handjobs one night in 5th grade
in fingerprint form on my ass. Seriously not cool. \ni bruiiiseeee like a delicate fruiiiitttt. Heeeaaarrr the rythymmm
Brian got his first ever blow job last night. We should make him a scrapbook.
Guess I was throwing darts at a patrons head last night, lol! Black out
We were high as balls fucking in the back seat when we saw the blue lights. He's like, "I got this" and walked over butt ass naked and goes, "Sorry dude, we're just banging" and the cop apologized for disturbing us and drove off.
Mashed potatoes are always the fuckin answer ok.
Thanks for ruining my life with your man penis
I made her pull the car over 5 times to puke because she was going to fast, apparently she was only going 30mph...
Randomize
