i just walked into a room at this party and someone yelled "dibs!"...
Its not like he dircectly choose a cheeseburger over sex, it was more like I said seductively "I really appreciate this and I'm going to make it up to you anyway I can" and he replied "i want a bacon cheeseburger"
i guess he just knew i was going to sleep with him either way
Haha I wonder if my burp offended him. So I gave him a fist pump to signify how friendly I am
All I've accomplished this quarter is making Uno an acceptable drinking game.
We uncovered another pile of vomit after you left. And i am not talking about the one in the vase
if i can get a chik with a dibaetes pump naked a sling certainly isnt going to get in my way
I brought some guy back to have cheese whiz with me. Then sent him home
Was he satisfied?
No, and very vocal about it.
Your engaged. Stop telling guys you will sit on their face. They don't always know your kidding.
Way to ruin everything
I am drinking jager with a cat, your argument is invalid
i mean, not my actual scene but if someone says "PARTY" ill figure it out
If you ever wanna get tagged teamed, army guys are pretty open to it. Write that down for future reference.
getting busted for public urination is like, a step above j-walking. you'll be fine
They put me in room 420 every time and I take bubble baths and smoke in the room and they bring food TO MY BED
I think that's the first time I had "ass rimming" scroll across my phone at work
You set a couch on fire in my brothers backyard?
Just the cushions
Randomize
