i'm at the gym and so are four guys who have seen my tits. i need winter break.
She swallowed my jizz and then took a shot of jack daniels and said "chaser." This cant be real life.
Highlight of my weekend: having my card suspended due to "suspicious charges" and standing in line at the gas station yelling at customer service on the phone that I really did go to 4 different strip clubs in one night
So how does it feel getting boo'd by the entire 5 guys restaurant
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Walt I've been the third wheel taking shotssssssssssssssssolo. Each s is for each solo shot.
Strip beer pong in the front yard? Of course the cops showed up
I know this is really fun but I don't wanna glow anymore
He got hit with a horseshoe, set on fire, fell out of a tree, and puked all over the side of his car, all before midnight. Everclear.
Apparently I missed the "You may have to jack off a horse" part of the application.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You made out with both twins? Ten points to you!
Didn't know where your dishes went. Put em in the bathtub. They're stacked taller than you. It's like modern art.
who knew magic tricks and sex would actually go together?
They said you went back in for 30 minutes and were walking with your arms out like an eagle soaring
When we got into his bed, his damn parrot started making sex noises in the other room
Jesus fuck. I just hit on him in front of the whole fire department. They hit the sirens and told us to get a room. FML. I can never go back to that fire station again...
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