thanks...oh and i got my period
told you
oh hush
I'm sorry for the crack den comment. You have a lovely apartment.
I just got a high school volleyball teams practice cancelled because I slept with the head coach through their practice time.
Don't blame the cocaine for your eating disorder.
I feel eeeverything like there's a rhythm and everything can be felt w/o ever touching it. And it's beautiful. Sunshine or raindrops it's like orgasming. Everything has a taste.
Think of where it's been though. That Dr. Suess book, "Oh the Places You'll go" was written for his penis.
Is it some european holiday today? We both woke up to find loaves of bread in our rooms...
Your CAR. Is in a LAKE. I'd say "a big mess" is a pretty conservative description of the situation.
She wouldn't put out on the first date. I think my boner put a hole in my mattress.
I was woken up in my old house by the new residents ... I don't even have a Key anymore
Did you just send me an ass picture with a quote from the lion king?
What are you gonna do about it?
I survive off of bourbon and the tears of others only
I may have taken the entire adderall. I FEEL LIKE THE FUCKIN HULK. I can't stop cleaning and organizing and doing the clean things
I have just received a gold-medal-deserving sext. He wrote me a fucking novel. Not only am I incredibly turned on but I am beyond impressed. He is the sext god. I must bow to him.
we're gonna read the declaration of independence and do a shot for every word he doesn't understand.
Randomize
