I just didn't expect you to be so naked....
I am drunk raised to the nth degree. The possibility of getting sick is approaching infinity.
Ughh on my way to the bathroom now... literally just puked on myself and cleaned it off with a hot dog bun... I love tailgate
winter break is gonna be like a weird mixture of rehab fat camp and holiday cheer.
Been drinkin since 3, wearing a tutu, how could things go wrong
So how many shot glasses of coffee grounds make a pot?
For sure. We should see if we can get Mike to pay for one, and have a triple kegger... :o==& (that's future me projectile vomiting. i try to be goal oriented)
I now have an ENTIRE drawer of unused disposable silverware from Boston Market... and you guys said I needed to "buy" kitchen stuff
my hip hurts so fuckin bad. and I just found a half eaten burrito in my nightstand drawer.
If I get over there and the april fools joke is that there's no HBO, I'm setting fire to the place.
he doesn't even text me anymore.. he just facebook chats me a shark emoticon which has turned into code for 'be naked at my house in 15 mins'
My mom just told me my dad shaves his pubes while drunk and I don't know how to feel anymore.
Do you know how close I got to throwing him over the edge of the canyon?
I woke up and finished the bottle like a champ
My "birthday sex" consisted of approximately 25 seconds of him going down on me in the shower.
Randomize
