How young is too young to ask my kid to make me a drink?
Just boiled hotdogs in bongwater. NOT a good idea.
i hope you realize that ur overconfidence only gave me one orgasm out of all the times we had sex. that's like a 1% success rate. u might wanna rethink how amazing you are.
I'm outside your house...sorry I feel like I don't need formal invites anymore.
you were making out, puked over his shoulder and insisted everything was okay
i dont know what to do
with your life?
no, with my silly bandz, im already wearing 3
i just found out the cashier has a picture of my junk in her phone.
im destined to be single forever. i hope its okay if your kids come and hang out with my cats.
Who was the person who brought the rooster when they won @ beer pong
I was wearing my get used bookstore shirt when we fucked. Ironic yet appropriate.
I think Saturday night will always be a mystery to me, except for buying an excessive amount of birthday shots for everyone and yelling BIRTHDAY SHOTS before every shot.
I woke up on a boat next to an extremely attractive man wearing nothing but a life jacket. Neither one of us owns a boat...
If I had feelings, you would have hurt them.
I would professionally fuck the shit out of her
Is it bad I use my AA meeting to hookup with guys?
Randomize
