Having a random hookup so left but love u
I drowning out her crying with songs from the Beatles it's good for us both. She relives her 30s and i dont have to hear her cry
saturday- my day is open, my legs are not. you in?
well apparently not.
she's on the floor slapping my dogs face with slices of pizza
he said I could live with him because I'm cheaper than a dog and don't need a pet deposit. That and I don't piss on the carpet...
I will fight anything that is not spinning right now
They both just did a shot, head butted each other, did another shot and then slapped each other in the face. These could be the two guys we've been looking for all our lives
sitting in the bathroom telling some girl to keep puking or she will die. while holding a beer. nursing school rocks.
I'll still trying to understand the context of your "punch her with my cock" comment.
We got kicked out of the ice rink last night for drinking and checking strangers... but they let us keep the beer
I'm currently looking through google images of circumsized penises and realizing how vital pre-marital sex is.
sorry bout that man. went out to pay the pizza boy, ended up hooking up with some random drunk girl that thought i was someone else
i cant believe we used adam and eve as a sexting theme last night
After I'd been making out with her for a good 15 minutes some guy yelled "grab this chicks beer she needs both hands!" And he was right I did need both: god bless jello wrestling.
I just got high and swiffered the bathroom floor....2 for 2 on brilliant life ideas
Randomize
