I am pretty sure the guy in the stall two dwn from me is jerking it...seriously
You should have seen her outfit yesterday. It was like pretty woman before Richard Gere gave her money to buy a new outfit.
My fight-or-flight response is really more fight-or-fuck
I realised my life had gone downhill since being unemployed when I was making key lime pie on acid at 3am Tuesday morning.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No. I heard a cover of "my heart will go on". This is not sanity.
I'm the only one who goes to a bar and leaves with an extra twenty bucks and a pumpkin.
Just did a "spirit of homecoming" bump off a stranger's credit card. A stranger that dropped us off at home. Erica's bad. How do allllll of the Eastern Europeans know how to find drugs so easily?!?
You were my sober police. You had one job and you failed miserably.
I'm a corrupt cop.
im so hung over everytime my dog barks the sound vibration makes my whole body hurt
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have a lot of questions this morning, most of them start with "Did I..."
Yep. My memoirs will be called "A Slore Worth Mentioning"
unless you have a dick and you were thinking of chopping that off
That Kevin guy is something else...His penis is fucking glorious. And he has a way with words. If he lived here I'd be the conductor of the fuck caboose. I mean literally I would never want to get off that thing.
why yes, bad decisions will be made starting at 3PM Thurs through 8PM on Sun. You have been warned. Plan accordingly.
Is it wrong to want to use the Dark Web to buy Vyvance for legitimate purposes?
Randomize