Are you drinking alone?
no, i'm watching house
That doesn't count.
wtf, then i'm always alone
My face smells like last night's lay. I need a whore bath. Or a corndog.
Busta Rhymes just yelled at me! He cut a song off and I was clapping and he looked right at me and said "don't fucking clap." I was that white guy.
Why am I drunk on a roof painting at 11 in the morning
Today my mom told me "that's what worries me about you getting blacked out drunk... You don't look pretty"
I'm in a hotel full of Marines. I'm leaving here pregnant.
It was actually pretty good. His cock is as fat as the rest of him and I took out my contacts so I couldn't see him clearly.
he does have a point though, watching you drink makes me never want to drink again
My night ended with Em alternately crying and throwing up in the arms of a guy wearing a cutoff and a tiara. I sat holding a garbage can and wine glass full of water wondering how our night got to this point.
I may have tried to encourage people to play a new game I invented last night. I called it Super Quarters. Like regular quarters, only using an AA medallion.
You blacked out at 9:30 and insisted on sleeping in the hallway after you chugged an entire pitcher of beer. I guess the Jell-O shots were stronger than we thought...
Drank your wedding present. Sorry
It's pretty self explanatory. You tried to have sex on the hood of a car in front of everyone
I pour the whiskey from now on
My nipples are raw, I've yet to go to bed, I feel like death, and I'm at work. Thank you jack, crown, and Lafayette!
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