I've decided to bang my pen-pal.
According to google history I spent most of last night trying to buy an elephant.
I should have but it might be too early in this fuckbuddyship to emasculate him
But i guess when you use blowjob as a verb you are entitled to some language allowances
mom found the triscuts in her underwear drawer, its done.
I do have sympathy for you. It's just not going to manifest as a blow job.
He kept calling my vagina a magic clam, and it was speaking to him, telling him to feed it his penis. I played along.
I rode a bull tonight, There is absolutely no reason my dick is not in some chicks mouth
Handicvap rails on the toilet atre soooooo fuckin handy right nmow.
So while you were living in this woman's apartment, you acquired a room mate, fucked her daughter, and killed her bunny. Worst sitter ever
I peed my pants and am still dancing with guys at the club because I liked my outfit too much to change. Call the ratchet emergency
We found him. He was passed out in a McDonalds booth with at least 6 big Mac wrappers. The employee said he kept yelling that he was in America and had the freedom to have big macs. Fucking Italians...
...I think I just watched a boy make a sandwich seductively. What.
She grabbed a $20 bill out of my hand, calling it a lap dance coupon and then she dragged me into her bedroom. I think I’m in love
Dude, running 15 min late.
Let's play a game, you pay for all the drinks I can finish before you get here. Go.
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