White coat. Heels.
the roller ball on my blackberry is the closest i've come to touching a clit in 2 years.
he fingered my asshole thinking it was my vag...I couldn't bring myself to tell him, mostly from shame for me and pity for him
the girl next to me at the bar JUST looked down at her vagina and said "im going to get you fed". if i come home alone tonight...i give you permission to cut off my penis
Judging by the crutches in the living room I take it you two are fine and we aren't going out tonight?
I don't appreciate the fact that you tagged me as a giant bucket Miracle Whip.
corona bottle fell out of my backpack and broke in the middle of my physics midterm. yay me.
I'm surprised I haven't crapped out a leprechaun, I'm so hungover
Lmfao I'm not trying to have a pissing contest over acid with my mom.....
our friendships a beautiful delicate flower...that has been crushed by peni
2:23 am. Im just at McDonalds, in my pajamas, at 2 am, paying in nickles, cuz thats how i roll.
2:26 am. Im just being thrown out of McDonalds, in my pajamas, at 2 am, without my nickles, cuz thats how i roll.
I don't want to go back to the suburbs. Being drunk in public isn't ok and theres too many children. Don't make me.
Pussy, Peanut Butter Cookies,and Bubble Wrap
The shrooms were awesome. Everyone's bones in their face looked so beautiful! Everyone had great face structures.
I just got a rock from a customer. Weirdest. Tip. Ever.
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