do all gilrs hav hair on thier vagaina ?
Don't drive home.
She wouldn't stop saying her own name. Like a damn pokemon.
I shagged another guy with one ball last night. Are there really that many dudes with one nut in la or am I just a magnet for prostetic testes?
I have now hooked up with 8 of the Apostles. I have no idea where I'm going to find a guy named Bartholomew.
I'd rather say I'm a whore then admit it's his child. Its that bad.
just so you know, you can get through airport security with handcuffs no questions asked
I figure hes like disneyworld. You know youre only going once or twice in life. Might as well have fun and ride the rides
doing shots of $6 a bottle whiskey and chasing it with milk. my own personal way of saying fuck life.
What I'm trying to say is, that time you chained me to my dresser and made me beg for it was incredibly romantic.
Say what you will, but only I can throw up on someone's door and make it look like art.
That's the last time I'm letting you drink that apple vodka
I had the most traumatic dream I've ever had just now. I ripped my dick off because a girl asked me to and spent the rest of the dream crying about my dick
From what I heard you ordered him to lick your balls. Unless you've kept a huge secret I understand his confusion.
I'm sorry I didn't get you anything for your birthday
It's just you didn't get me the fucking bear suit last year
I've had your balls on my face a bunch of times so the least you could do is buy a girl some dinner.
Two of my dealers just made friends at this party. Do you think one will be pissed if I buy from the other or should I just go 50/50?
Randomize
