we're blogging at a bar
I haven't seen Daniella all day...are you sure she was safe going home with that guy?
oh don't worry! i asked him if he was a rapist. he said no
My psychiatrist is "consulting" others. I am high-achieving nuts.
I figured he was gay when I walked in on him working out to Flirty Girl Fitness.
his pokemon pajamas? the fact that he was proud of the stretchmarks on his arms? or finding out he has a daughter that went to high school with us? ...you tell me what was the dealbreaker
Please don't let me drink ever again. I apparently told him he could stay but as there was no room in the bed he'd have to lie on top of me and he'd need to anchor himself on with his penis so he didn't fall off.
The best way to start drinking is as early as possible. eg, this bar isn't open but we're patiently waiting outside. That way you're confident and exciting when the talent arrives. Or too drunk to care.
Dude you were tripping so badly we put a pretend box around your head and you spoke silently for the rest of the night. I think pterodactyls were involved.
At our floor meeting the RA was talking about bathroom hygiene and I really wanted to be like "what about shower sex."
Valid question
Their first impression of me was that I was completely naked. So yeah college hasn't even started yet and I'm already that person.
I woke up in a chipotle parking lot with an industrial sized box of condoms and a bag of dounut holes. I need Jesus
You know how I know last night was a good night? Because I remember high fiving a couple WHILE they were having sex.
i just drunk stumbled into my home... to figure out that we moved 2 weeks ago..
I have finally found someone I enjoy for reasons that do not necessarily include his dick
I need more 20 something year old penis in my life
Randomize
