just did a line in a complete hula outfit off a chick in a devil costume. do you think hell will be this good?
There comes a time in every man's life where he has to shit in a catbox to prove a point.
I think i found my new favorite workout. Go to a party where you dont know anybody and constantly walk around the house so you dont look awkward standing alone. im up to 1.8 miles
turns out gay frats are just like normal frats, only with more v-necks
you lied. pity sex is amazing.
Important life lesson - flammable and inflammable mean the same thing
His fridge was full of blocks of pepperjack cheese, and his pantry was stocked with huge jars of jellybeans. Even if I'd been drunk, I don't think I could've made that up.
She has a facebook friends list called oops. theres 33 people in it. she said its all the guys she regrets fucking.
It was that same situation where "cuddling on the floor" was actually just code for "rough shameful hate sex" hahaha.
can I share that I'd like to fuck him in my new car as a sort of car warming present to myself?
Apparently I was telling them, "I AM A STRONG INDEPENDENT WOMAN AND I DON'T NEED YOU TO HOLD MY HAIR," and I pulled my hair back and puked.
Scientific fact: if he makes a face like a demonic dog when he's fucking you, makes it easier to fuck without feelings.
Was that before, or after strip tac toe.....
Woke up with a bed full of sand...care to explain?
Isnt is self explanatory?
If I knew the person sucking my dick didn't say thank you for their Christmas presents I wouldn't be able to cum.
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